Morning everyone! How are we already into Wednesday this week? I’m actually excited to pop in today and link up with 2 of my favorite bloggers on how I keep my marriage strong. It’s a topic that comes up frequently with some of my friends who are recently engaged or newlyweds.
Zach and I have been together for 10 years this September and celebrating 5 years of marriage in July. While I’d like to think we know how to keep our love as exciting as it was when we first began dating in college, truthfully we’ve had hard times come our way that have left us questioning our marriage at times. So how do you keep your marriage strong you ask? I thought I’d share 5 tips that have really helped us through the difficult times ( and they do happen ).
1. Communicate – I’m sure so many of you may know this already but communication really is key when it comes to having a strong marriage. So many past relationships of mine have ended because we never talked about what was making us angry, scared or upset. We never talked about what made us happy or feel less stressed. We were just there in this relationship that wasn’t going anywhere. Zach has always made it a point to make sure I’m expressing what I’m feeling instead of holding it in ( a fault of mine ). It’s something I constantly work on even if I’m worried about what the outcome is.
2. Give and Take – When we first had Lily I thought I could handle the stress of being a new Mom and still get chores and other items off my list done before my husband came home from work. HA ! Fat chance! Relationships shouldn’t be based on what you have to do around the house or what your husband has to do. It’s a give and take. There are so many moments where I just need a break and instead of saying to myself ” you have too “, I ask for help from my husband who 99% of the time is always happy to do so and vs. versa. There are day where he really doesn’t feel like cooking, helping to clean or run a particular errand and will ask me to do so. We always appreciate when the other one is willing to help and I know you will too.
3. Continue to Date – This might sound silly to some but it’s a piece of advice a friend gave to me when Zach and I first became engaged. Of course marriage has it’s ups and downs and we’ve had our fair share of those of course but what makes it continue to work is the fact that we set time out to spend quality time together. It doesn’t have to be a fancy night out to dinner- even just grabbing popcorn and watching a few episodes of a favorite show of ours is what we enjoy doing together. Check out these 7 date night ideas or acting like kids again. We had a blast.
4. Never Go To Bed Angry – Zach really was the one that should take credit for this. I used to always get upset and shut down when I didn’t want to talk but he pushes me to keep going ( as I mentioned with our communication ). We try to work everything out before bed because who really wants to wake up the morning, still in a bad mood? Not us!
5. Put One Another First – I’ve had friends that used to tell me they would do anything for their children and then their spouse. We knew from the beginning that in order for our children to have a good example of a healthy, happy marriage, that we should put the other person first. Kiss one another in front of our kids? You bet. Laugh and joke about ridiculous moments? Of course! Putting your significant other first means that you’re showing daily affection, communication and above all, the love and care that you promised when you made your vows.
Loved your post too! Give and Take- AMEN!
Heck yes Holly! Happy Wed 😀
All good tips! I especially like 'putting each other first" truly a great example for our children.
Agreed Liz! Thanks for your sweet comment!
Great post!!! Love your advice!!!
thanks Britt 😀
100% agree with the give and take. It's a lesson I had to learn as a new mom…it's ok to ask for help!
agreed too! i need that as a reminder when our second comes in a few months!
Love #2 and #5! Great post. 🙂
"Relationships shouldn't be based on what you have to do around the house or what your husband has to do." TRUTH
Give & take! Yes! I love that! And I LOVE still dating my hubby even after 14 years!
Such a sweet wedding photo! Great advice! My husband's sweet Grandpa told my husband at our wedding reception that we should never go to bed angry. So true!
I was definitely saying "PREACH IT!" to each of these! Great post. 🙂
Great post!! I really struggle with the "never go to bed angry". I am totally okay with going to bed and sleeping on it and praying that the next day will be better. This is definitely something I need to work on. I also love your wedding pic – so pretty.
Great advice! The never go to bed angry isn't always easy for me. When I get upset I definitely want to just crawl in the bed go to sleep and forget about it. Not the greatest solution! Enjoyed reading! 🙂
Great tips and so true! My husband and I dated 5 years before getting married, too! 🙂 Thanks for commenting so I could find your blog! Can't wait to read more!
Never go to bed angry…such a good one.
Great post and I agree with it all! Except I wish I could say I don't go to bed angry, sometimes it happens but it always bothers me!
Never going to bed angry is HUGE! I love your post!
Give and Take is a great one!!
Great post! And a big fat amen to the dating your husband part, so important!!
Congratulations on 10 years together! Date nights are a great idea, keep it up!
I loved all your tips! Especially the one on 'give and take' because I couldn't do life without my spouse pitching in to help me or vice versa! Thanks for stopping by my blog and commenting 🙂
Give and take!! Yes. Funny how that changes and evolves over the years too!! Great post.
Great tips! Communication is definitely key!
I agree with all of these, but #4 is also something that is so important to us. We can't go to bed mad. We will stay up forever hashing something out before we go to sleep. It's like we NEED to resolve stuff and move on. So happy to have found your site! Just liked your FB page and am happy to start following along!
Great tips! Love your wedding photo!
I definitely agree with not going to bed angry. I will stay up as long as possible to get things sorted through so that we can wake up to a fresh and new day!
What great tips. We do a lot of these in our marriage and #4 is definitely been such a big one in our marriage. My husband's grandma told us this the day we got married and we have kept this advice close to our hearts. Communication is one of the most important tools in our marriage. Have a great day!
I loved the ideas for dates and acting like a kid again! It's a good reminder that a "date" doesn't have to mean going out and spending money!
I love this post! Thank you for sharing! We don't have kids yet but we need to remember to date each other still. Sometimes it feels like every night is a date because it's always just the two of us, but it's nice to get out and do something special and different and really concentrate on each other!