With so much going on in life, working full time, juggling time management between my husband and my toddler, cleaning the house, seeing and visiting with friends, writing a weekly blog, repping two clothing companies and about 23947 other things I could share, my ability to say ‘yes’ to everything has really started to take its toll. Let’s first start by saying I’m not complaining as I clearly am the one that said ‘yes’ to all these fabulous things. In fact, if you ask me to do something for you, I’m almost 99% certain I will say yes which can be daunting down the road. I feel guilty saying no at times, torn by the fact that even at almost 30, I hate making people upset.
However, there are times that I felt I should have said no and mad that I couldn’t have come out and said it in the first place. So here’s why it’s ok to say No when you need too.
1. You can’t control others opinions about you. As a people pleaser by nature, this guts me. I want to please people but realize that I’m not able too. However, I need to stay true to myself and if I don’t feel like going out to the bar with girlfriends and would rather throw sweatpants on, vegging in front of the TV watching another episode of Sophia The First with my two year old, then that’s my choice.
2. Life Moves On. I say yes to most things because I hate missing out. I hate missing the parties I couldn’t attend, the lunch date with my best friend or a fun road trip because I pile too much on my plate. I really just don’t want to miss out on what’s in front of me and to slow down at times. It’s ok to take it slow and not rush rush rush everywhere.
3. Detailed Excuse. As life usually works, I’ll have 2 amazing things to do at the same time and almost at the same time. I used to be such a go getter and actually attempt to make both events if I could but now realizing I just can’t do that anymore, when I do say ‘no’ to that other person, I plan something else to do with them another time.
4. Put Your Own Needs First– Ultimately its your life and how you want to live it. There have been several occasions where I felt out of place is saying yes to something I really didn’t want to do but then had a great time! You know yourself and what you can do and what you can’t.
Do you have trouble saying no to people? What are some things you do?